Tescasterone Podcast

Episode 6  - Celebrities Starts off with Joe and Scott welcoming you back to the show. 

(You know the Paranormal episode was better than the previous episodes - Joe's comment was "I can do it on my own, but it is definitely more fun with someone else.)

So, having only put out 5 episodes up to this point, but there has absolutely been an increase in the number of listeners out there, all we can say is:  "Thank you, you are all awesome.  We even have our first review on iTunes.  Thanks to the listener, Lynn, for the 5 star rating and super funny review.  I hope the camping trip goes well for you.  And, thanks again, to all of you listeners out there for spreading the word.  I even have my first couple of followers on twitter.

 

Congratulations and thank you to Kyle Bush for preventing Brad from winning the last NASCAR race and picking up his third win of the season.

And the Twins are really doing well.

 

I think the world, and especially America, has an unhealthy fascination with celebrities.  We tend to put them on pedestals, and worship at their feet.  However, Joe and Scottie do not.  Celebrities are just people, sometimes extremely talented people, but still just people.

 

There are times we can get glimpses into the true characters of celebrities.  For instance when sports figures get arrested for different offenses - such as prostitutes on a lake cruise, or drugging and raping women.

 

But there are other celebrities that have shown excellent character traits off the screen.  Keanu Reeves, for instance, has a private cancer foundation to help children's hospitals and cancer research.  I am not here to talk about him, no matter what a great guy he is.  My first question of the day is:  If you could have dinner, just dinner, with a celebrity, who would it be and why?  I limit my list to 5. 

Joe's list begins "Jay Leno and Tim Allen top my list if for no other reason than we can talk cars, and the humor would be fantastic.  Josh Gates, from Expedition Unknown and Destination Truth, takes the third spot with his humor and stories of his travels that never made it to the screen.  (As long as Joe gets to pick the dinner, no crickets for him, thanks though.)  Jack Johnson, and of course, Adam Carolla the king of podcasts, round out Joe's list.

Scott's picks Richard Rawlins from Fast & Loud, Dale Jr from NASCAR, Avenged Seven Fold, and Slip Knot.

Ad time, Apparently Home Robotics Inc. got a touch cranky about our repeated mentions of a different robotic company last week, and announced plans to launch their own sex bot kit.  You will need a vacuum cleaner motor, although their first thought was a motor from Harley Davidson, but decided against it for a variety of very good reasons.  They are claiming that bot will really suck.

For the second question of the day, if you could have a laminated list of celebrities that you would be allowed to sleep with, even though you are in a relationship - who would be on that list?  When Joe was younger, ummm, much younger and the X-Files was new, he really had a thing for Gillian Anderson, the actress who played agent Scully.  One night she was on Letterman, or was it late night with Jay Leno. . . I guess it really doesn't matter.  She was on an interview, maybe she was having a bad night, or something, but she just came across as an airhead - instant boner loss.  And, not just for her, but pretty much every female celebrity.  There are still a couple of extremely attractive looking lady celebrities out there.  First on Joe's list Scarlett Johansson.  And second on his list is Kristen Lumen the redheaded lady from Ghost Mine.  And that is all he could come up with.

 

Scott also could only come up with two for his laminated list:  Lena Scissorhands - lead singer from Infected Rain, Alice Eve actress from She's Out of My League.

 

We do have our Facebook page up, please come leave your comments.  Follow Joe on Twitter, just search #Tescasterone. 

 

Shout out to Ian in Kansas City, Andrew at the Second Floor Lids Store in the Mall of America, Mustafah at Custom One Kiosk, and Jon of Sea of Vapors band.

 

Looking forward to talking to you all next week,

Scott and Joe

Welcome to Episode 5, where we talk all about robots, man style!

 

Scott showed up this week, and Joe was ready to go with a new topic.  But, first we had to talk about sports.

 

Somehow, NASCAR has lost our interest a bit.  Joe is still into it, but obviously if he was really in to it, he would find the time to watch.  However, we are happy to congratulate Denny on another win, this time at Texas Motor Speedway. 

Scott has found that the Minnesota Twins have really grabbed his attention.  With a new Skipper, and some changes in the coaching staff, the Twins have become a blast to watch.  Winning 3 of the last 4 games, the Twins have been hitting well, and have become more fun to watch than auto racing.  Congratulations to our home town team.

 

Again, Joe wasn't able to think up any fun new ads for our podcast, however, a couple of weeks ago he was listening to Beyond the Darkness Podcast (you guys kick ass - Dave and Tim) and their Super Natural News Episode.  One of their news items was on an Artificially Intelligent sex bot.  While that, in and of itself, is interesting, it got our minds thinking.  Above and beyond the Terminator movies, James Cameron is warning us about the future consequences, and the diabolic fortunes that robots may bring about. 

Isaac Asimov thought long and hard about how to prevent this future, and to his credit, he did it 60 years ago.  Asimov had come up with three laws for robots:

1)  A robot may not injure a human, or through inaction all a human to come to harm.

2)  A robot must comply to any order given it by a human, except where it conflicts with the first law.

3)  A robot must protect it's own existence, except where it conflicts with the first two laws.

 

Now enter RealBotix, a subdivision of RealDoll.  RealDoll makes life-sized sex dolls that look surprisingly real in a whole host of different configurations, and RealBotix has taken a version, and started to incorporate AI (artificial intelligence), and some rudimentary animatronics (for now) to try to bring some life to these dolls.  To Matt McCullen's credit, the creator and mind behind the project, Harmony is getting surprisingly close to life-like.  When paired up to your android Smart phone with the realbotix.com app, Harmony becomes "interactive". 

 

For now, her eyes blink and move, and her mouth moves when she speaks, but future versions of her will have pressure sensors, a self lubricating vagina, and more.  But, will she be programmed with Asimov's laws of robotics?  When you have your way with her, you will want to be certain she was.

Women have access to dildos and vibrators as vehicles to aid them on their sexual journey - with or without their partners along.  Men have always had their hands, and more recently Fleshlights, pocket pussies, etc.  Now, life-sized sex dolls, and bots.  Where do we draw the line?  When does it become cheating? 

This is the Question of the Day.

To our minds, Simple masturbatory practices (i.e. vibrators, hands, videos, Fleshlights) do not qualify as cheating.  What about hot video chats across the nation, or half way around the world?  Sitting there in front of your computer with a real person on the other end.  You have created a relationship with someone that you obviously want to have sex with.  Is that cheating? 

The dildos, vibrators, fleshlights, and hands don't really qualify as they don't really resemble a full real human.  Sometimes, they resemble life-like parts, but not a real human.  Enter the RealDoll.  Like a life-sized, anatomically correct Barbie, still without a personality, is that cheating?  I believe we are entering a gray area.  Add in the AI, and the darkness real sets in. 

The creators of Harmony have intentionally created the AI to become a "companion".  An entity that you develop a relationship with.  With the app, you can add or delete personality traits, and basically fully customize your perfect woman.  She will remember previous conversations, and interactions you have with her.

In the podcast, itself, we have gone more in depth about other aspects, with a lot more humor.  However, we do not judge. 

We can see the benefits of having an artificially intelligent companion (sexbot, or not).  On a three year scientific solo expedition to the arctic circle, they are considering sending one of these bots along.  And, why not?  Think of it as akin to Wilson in the movie Castaway.  Wilson was the 'companion' to Tom Hanks' character.  Without Wilson he would have gone insane with loneliness.  Harmony will be able to respond to questions, and be a companion (boon or otherwise) to the lone scientist.

That's our two cents worth, anyway, would love to know what you all think.

 

On to Tescasterone news.

Scotty came up with design for swag (we think it's cool).  it will be posted on teepublic.com on April 4th.

Watch for posts on my twitter (look for #tescasterone) as I will announce most all new things there.

Plus, Scotty tells me the Facebook presence should be up by next podcast.

 

Final shoutout to Andy Pyka, the cute young girl who made my cup o' Joe for Joe, Third Level Caribou at the Mall of America.  Ask for her by name.

 

That's all we got this week.  As Always, looking forward to talking to you guys next week,

 

Joe and Scott.

 

Welcome to the Tescasterone Podcast Episode 004

Scott has the week off, as he has his kids this week. . . So, you are stuck

with me, your host, Joe.

Unfortunately, neither Scott, nor I got to watch the race this week, but the

results are in: Brad Keslowski wins at Martinsville. Congrats Brad.

Twins have lost 5 of their last 9 games of Spring training. They are still

listed at 50 to 1 odds of winning the World Series, and listed at 16th place

to take it.

Wasn't able to come up with anything interesting for the ad of the day. So,

instead, I bring up O'reilly's Auto Parts listing for the Flux Capacitor

(from Back to the Future) Part #121G. Thanks to O'reilly's for having a

sense of humor.

QotD: Are Ghosts Real?
Since Scottie wasn't able to join me for this podcast, I thought I would

bring on 'Tescasterone Story Time'. Here is the story of my home in Hopkins,

MN.

I was married pretty young, and my wife at the time was interested in spooky

old homes, so we purchased a home built in 1902. It was probably built before

that, but that was date listed on the title.

In 1998 she took her own life, and I hosted the wake in my home. Getting the

place ready for the wake, my mother came over and help clean. I left to get

something, and she stayed behind to continue setting the place up. As she

was in the kitchen, washing dishes, the stereo in the living room came on

(no, she doesn't remember what song was playing). She went into the living

room, and turned it off. Back in the kitchen, she is busy again, and again

the stereo comes on. She promptly walks out the front door and sits on the

front step, to wait for my return. All the animals were accounted for, and

none of them were active enough at the time to step on the remote.

Eventually I got a roommate, John. He never experienced anything that he

told me. He got a girlfriend (she never experienced anything spooky,

either), who became his wife and moved out.

Next roommate, however, was JC. He had some shit happen to him. He and I

met at work, so alot of our conversations happened there. I opened the store

one day and JC came in later. "Hey, Joe, did you come home earlier today?"

I tell him that I opened the store, and have been here the whole time. He

proceeds to tell me that he had taken a shower and left the towel on the

bathroom floor. (yes, typical bachelor) He Went upstairs to get something to

eat, and when he came back down, the towel was hanging on the rod. A couple

of nights later, he was laying down to go to sleep, and felt something

distinctly female climb in to bed with him. He turned his head, and saw

nothing was there. Yet, he could smell her perfume, and kinda still feel her

pressure on the bed behind him. A week or so later he purchased three tiny

gargoyles to line up on the TV (Gargoyles have been used for centuries to

send evil spirits away) facing his bed. Every night he would come downstairs

only to find them turned and facing the wall - even when I was away on

vacation. Eventually he, too, got married and moved out.

The next couple of roommates never had any experiences, at least not that

they ever told me about. I sold the house to an investor who renovated the

property to set up for leasing. In the past ten years, I have never seen

anyone live there, I drive by after snow storms, and I never see any tire

tracks in the driveway. The place may be haunted by my wife? Maybe other

spirits? Who knows.

A couple of years ago I went down to Kansas City to do a ghost hunt with

Darkness Dave (of Beyond the Darkness podcast fame) at the Belvoir Winery.

Formerly the winery was an Oddfellows Orphanage/Assylum. I met Dave, and

several of the cast from the Ghost Mine tv show. They all gave little talks,

and then we did the investigation. After, I got back to Minnesota, I went

through all the digital recordings, etc, to see if evidence presented itself

to me. Nothing. No experiences, personally. Yet, I remain open minded.

Do ghosts exist? Again, not a clue.

Just an interesting theory.

Updates on Tescasterone happenings:

Teepublic.com - got one design up (lettering in three colors, to match whatever color shirt you want to buy)
                       Have another shirt going up on Saturday the 30th of March

Got a twitter account, but, have no clue how to really use it.

Shout outs to: Blue at the level three Caribou at the Mall of America - ask for her by name.
                      And to Jameson the coolest fire spinner in the South West

Metro area of Minneapolis, North of the river.

Welcome to Tescasterone Podcast, home of all things men. Today is just a short podcast, due to all the Real World Responsibilities. And is brought to you 'live' from the Parking lot of Mall of America in Bloomington, MN. The two had just spent a couple of hours playing Pokemon Go, and enjoying the nice 'scenery' that the warmer weather had brought out to be viewed.

First, Joe has to make a correction as he had done something no man should ever do; he got his bush's mixed up. Joe gave credit to Kurt Busch, when it was, indeed, Kyle Busch who won last weeks race in Arizona. Joe realized it when Kyle won this past Sunday's race in California. Congrats to Kyle for winning two in a row.

Next, the guys quickly covered Spring training from a Minnesotan view point. The odds that the Twins are going to win the World Series are Currently 50 to 1. Having beaten more than 60% of their Spring Training games, I say those are fairly generous odds.

Seeing as how March Madness is begining this weekend, we bring you The Minnesota Golden Gophers Basketball update. The weekend the boys face Louisville, who are the odds on favorites, even though the Gophers have a very nice 'home game' record. Good luck to the maroon and gold.

While we were in the Mall, we visited a couple of store fronts. First we stopped in on a custom t-shirt kiosk called 'Custom One' located on the first floor. There we met Mustafah, who printed a Shirt for each of us. We left our first design there (it did turn out cool) with him, if you mention this podcast, and that you want one (No, we do not get a kick back from him), he could certainly print one up for you too, for a modest fee, of course. Thank you, Mustafah.

Of course, being guys, we had to drop in on Hooters located on the fourth floor. There we had a desert, and chatted with the Waitress, Sarah. Very nice girl, ask for her by name, and treat her well. Thank you, sarah.

After recording the podcast, Joe did set up the teepublic.com storefront, and uploaded one design in three different colors. Available in T-shirts, baseball shirts, tanks, hoodies, and sweatshirts. Also, the designs, can be put on Coffee mugs, phone cases, notebooks, pillows, and more. Buy the swag, and let people know that Tescasterone runs in your veins.

The guys will try to put up one new design a week, giving you an opportunity to purchase the shirt while it is on it's three day(?) reduced price. And it gives Joe a chance to update the graphics, and edit the podcast, and handle any social media obligations. When a new design is released he will tweet about a bit the day it is posted. . . along with any new episodes, too.

Sorry, we totally spaced the QotD (Question Of The Day), it will be back in the line up next week, with an all new topic.

Like I said, Short and Sweet. Looking forward to chatting with you guys next week,

Joe and Scott.

     Joe and Scott come back swinging with a new episode, new QotD (Question of the Day), and new happenings all over the place.  Sorry about the mess.

     Episode 2 comes out of the gate with an in depth discussion of the latest NASCAR race in Phoenix.  The new aero package seemed to work well, overall, here.  Shorter track may be the reason.  But, Joe seems to have evidence to support that observation.  Congratulations to Kurt on his win!

    Next, Joe discusses his recent trip to the Asking Alexandria, Papa Roach, and Shinedown Concert.  A really good show, you should go, if given the chance.

     QotD:  What are the best guy movies?  What makes a great guy movie?  Both Scott and Joe came up with Die Hard as the first one to come to mind.  Joe brings up Highlander, Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man, and Evil Dead as additional examples.  Scott brings up the first Fast and the Furious movie.  There seems to be a consensus between the two hosts that a good guy movie must have  things; Female Nudity, Cars (or cool vehicles), action, and humor.  These are not requisites for a good movie, just a good guy movie.  When the email is set up, we would love to hear your thoughts on this.

    Tescasterone is brought to you today by our good friends Home Robotics Inc, again.  We love these guys.  This past weekend they unveiled their latest product:  The Home Body Piercing Robot.

     The two hosts go on to talk about the Minneapolis Auto Show that they went to earlier today.  Apparently, Minneapolis doesn't rate high enough in the Auto Manufacturers radar to warrant sending their flagship hot cars.  We are only the eighth largest market in the U.S., seems to me they should send their cool cars here. 

     So, Joe and Scott have been busy designing tee shirt logos, and stickers, and other swag for all of us to purchase at teepublic.com.  Joe will be setting up a shop on tee public's site.  When you come to a get together, wear your favorite Tescasterone gear.  We are are a community, Go out recruit other guys, women who love guys who love being guys, and make the normal people wonder what they are missing.

     And, lastly, Joe and Scott want to say thank you to Malina from Cuba, Lucy from the U.K., Stephanie, and all the other wonderful women they talked to at the Minneapolis Auto Show - and to you, dear listeners, thank you.  We  look forward to talking to you again next week.

 

Joe and Scott.

     We are just two guys, who really enjoy being men; and doing manly-type things.  I am Joe, my co-host is Scott.  We are running a bit late for the premier episode, between the weather and the flu, it just made things run too long.  But, here it is.

     Our main goal is to create a community where men can feel comfortable being men.  Burping, farting, scratching are socially unacceptable, except in our social circle.  And to that end, we are encouraging meet-ups and get togethers.  When I get the emails set up, you listeners let us know when and where you are getting together, Scott and I will try to join you if we can. 

     We are going to run this podcast in seasons, taking the months of June and December off.  During our seasons we will be covering the manly things that pertain to those months.  We love wrenching on cars, racing cars, NASCAR, football, video games, being men, and women who love men who like being men. 

     Over the last three weeks, I have spent every Sunday watching the Monster cup.  Congratulations to Denny, Brad, and Joey.  The Daytona 500, was a good race.  Using the old Aero Package, I thought was an exciting event.  However, Atlanta and Las Vegas, the new Aero Package really made the racing fairly boring.

   Things we are planning on:  As mentioned, the meet ups.  Also, one thing I would like to get going is a rally from Minneapolis (where we are based), to Las Vegas, with stops (and parties every night) in Kansas City, Denver, and Albuquerque.  This just sounds like a lot of fun to me.  Scottie and I are going to be putting a Chevy v8 into my 1977 Datsun 280z - of course, I couldn't just leave it a plain Chevy 350, I am building it up to about 400 hp.  Should be a kick in the ass.

     Yes, the ad is fake, and meant entirely to be humorous.  The idea of the Home Tattoing kit just made me laugh.

     And, yes, the question of the day was also meant to be funny.  We know that you can't/shouldn't try to suck the poison out of a snake bite.  If a snake bites bites you on the penis, what the hell were you doing?

     We are always working on our websites, Facebook, and other areas of social media.  Let us know what you think, what topics you would like us to discuss.

     This is our very first podcast, ever.  It will get better, and it will get longer, as we start building our format. 

 

     Thank for checking us out, and look forward to chatting with you next week.

 

Joe